I watch. Silently, of course. There is no other way for me now. Quietly I keep my vigil, feeling a terrible sadness as my... what can I call him? My friend, my companion... no, he's more than that. I watch as the person whom I had tried to shield, at a certain fair woman's request so long ago, turns into something that he should not be.

It's ironic- he had always been the light, the bright angel with the ambition and dreams to reach for the stars. I had merely been the helpmeet, the one who supported him on the way- the one who could not fly, that needed his winged dreams to soar. But now, his brightness was becoming tarnished, and I cannot help. Ironically, I have become what he represented in my life, and yet, I have turned into the most helpless of beings...

I cannot support, and I cannot touch. I can only gaze upon what had been our beautiful dream, and watch it become soaked in mad ambition and blood, as Reinhard becomes what he should not be. Intangible and invisible, I am the silent angel that cannot even be a guardian. Merely an observer- that is the price.

On the way to my judgment, to the next phase in life, I had begged the keepers of the gate to be granted a chance to watch over him. They had allowed me to do so, but at a price. Silence. He may not see, may not know... So I float above him, hoping that another will take my place as advisor, and grieving to see him so hurt at my abandonment of him.

Then, when I can do no more except wish, I drift to other people's realities. I cannot move physically, but strong wills and associations call to me. So I am pulled to the one place I truly don't wish to be- Annerose-sama's place of atonement for what she feels is her fault. I watch as she sits in her mountain villa, shutting out her brother, her life. As she embroiders endless cushions, curtains and bedspreads, I feel her pain.

I want to go up to her as I could not in life, and comfort her, give her peace. I want to shout out that it was not her fault- that it had been my choice, my path. But I cannot. Silence, once again, impenetrable, terrible. So I watch as her long-unshed tears finally spill out onto threads and half-done designs, and mourn for the life we could have shared.

Gratefully, I am pulled again, away from that terrible scene. To the other great player in the game of the universe, Yang Wenli. I smile as I see his feckless attitude turn into real wisdom as he and his ward share a moment of wisdom. I wish... I wish that he and Reinhard could exist together as friends, as comrades. What kind of galaxy would exist if only...

My all to brief smile turns to sadness as I see Yang's own pain. His ward, that bright young man I had met for such a short time, is going on the path that Yang would least wish him to walk upon. No stopping Julian... no stopping the war. Both are out of anyone's control, especially mine. How many more will die because...

For all the wandering, I am always pulled back to my light. Reinhard. He is standing before the window, trying to make sense out of this world. He has the locket in his hand- the one that holds all his wishes and wants and I wish... Then, I feel it- his quiet appeal, not to the heavens or to any gods, but to me. A silent cry for enlightenment, delivery.

Somehow, at his plaintive wish for guidance, I can speak. It is only a brief window of opportunity, but it is enough. I know I appear in front of him, as I see his startled look, and I manage to whisper to him, as I have wanted to, "Reinhard-sama." That half-reproving remark is all I am allowed, but I see it taken to heart.

For that moment, I allow myself to feel hope. Perhaps this course can still go the way we had wanted. He may be able to spread his light throughout the galaxy. So I watch happily as he does what he would have done if I were still beside him. I know exactly what I had been- the tempering influence, the balm against the cold corruption of that other's counsel. For now, Reinhard is on the path that we had been walking together.

But.

He stumbles, falls, even if he does not see it. Expediency, necessity. All of those comforting half-truths lead him from the ideal, from the light to the darkness. I can only watch as he propels himself closer and closer to that pit, to that void. Encouraged by Oberstein, his fall is only prevented only by the work of another.

She is good for him- I can tell. I wish that he would listen to her more, for the Fraulein's perception is something that is lacking in him right now. But he refuses to see anything in his search to fufill some greater obsession. If only I had realized what my death would do, I would have-

No. I could not have done less than what I had done. It had been my duty. My cause. All I have, all I had, was for him. Whatever he needed... I had known that since his sister- my lady- had been taken away. For his brilliant goals, I had become what he needed. And during that time, what he had needed was my life. So be it.

But, I somehow wish... I wish that I could cry, shed tears for all that has gone wrong after I'd left. But I cannot do even that. Instead, I huddle in the wings that fate or some cruel god had given me in a horrible jest, and watch the bright path crumble at his feet, as his vision is blinded, darkened.

I feel the next turn of the wheel pulling me away, but I never move. Stubbornly, I cling onto him and watch. Desperately, I wait for that next time when I may be able to help him, support him. I wish I could be as I should be for him, if only for a moment. I know I can go on, but I also know that I must stay, and remain until he is done, and has become what he must. Then perhaps he and I may go on together to the light...

---Finis---