from: grandpoobah@kkk.org

Dear Good Doctor,

Several weeks ago the great state of Florida denied us permission to participate in the "Adopt-a-Highway" program. We all is very upset. We is just like the Elks or the Lions, or any other civic organization. Well, except for the lynchings, the cross-burnings, the church-bombings, and a couple of other things. But other than that, we is just a bunch of good ol' boys. Why, we wouldn't hurt a fly. Well, maybe a black fly. Or a Jewish fly! Can you help us, Doc?

the doctor's reply:

No. I wouldn't help you dirtbags if I got a guaranteed ticket to heaven for doing so (which is about 180 degrees off from where I think you gentlemen are heading, although that is not my decision to make.) But you know, I really don't blame you guys. I blame the intelligentsia of the South. The college-educated. The intellectuals. All those who actually have an IQ above 50 and who did not marry their sister, which does not include you guys. For they are the ones that have kept all the wonderful myths about the South, and what you were fighting for in the Civil War, alive. State's rights, my ass! The only state's right you cared about was the right to keep darker skinned human beings in the cotton fields, and to treat them as if they were animals. You know, the Doctor's dear old Dad was a German soldier in World War II. Just a German grunt who spent four years in combat in Russia and saw all his friends die. Yet long before he himself died in 1983, he admitted that he was glad Germany had lost, and that they had fought for a stupid cause. I honor his memory to the utmost, yet I will not hesitate to say the same thing. Why is it impossible for the South to say they same thing? You have to change it after the fact to something more palatable and wrap it up in pretty ribbons of glory. The South will be schizophrenic until they can admit that they fought for a stupid cause, and that they are glad they lost. And after they truly do that, the KKK will no longer even exist. It will be a footnote in the bad old history, and no semblance of it will exist in the bright new one to come. So the answer is , no.