from: spooky@cia.gov

Dear Good Doctor,

We would like to use your site to clear up some of the continuing questions raised in the media concerning aliens, UFOs, and Area 51. We can now reveal for the first time that during much of the 1950s, the U.S. Air Force was conducting highly classified water balloon tests, and untrained observers could very easily have been mistaken these for UFOs. Moreover, all the aliens looked sort of like Woody Allen, only shorter, so we never have been sure exactly what to classify them as. And there is no secret military installation called "Area 51." We have long since changed the name. It's now called the "Barry Goldwater Memorial Dude Ranch." Of course, you will shot if you try to get inside. Wait a second. I have just been handed a new memo from my superiors............ Forget everything I have just said. It is no longer operative. Just kidding. Ha, ha. Don't worry. Be happy.

the doctor's reply:

Well, I guess that explains everything. Sorry we doubted you.